Make the time and effort

Our whole country has been behind our cricket team. They played South Africa on Tuesday with the winning team progressing to the semi finals in the World Cup. Many people took the afternoon off work to either go to the match or watch it on TV. We won and have now progressed through to the semi finals. We will play this match on Sunday, in Melbourne. This time we are playing against Australia. After the win on Tuesday many people here rushed to get airfares, accommodation and tickets in order to go to this game. In other words people can always make an effort and find the time and money to do what they actually want to do.

This got me thinking about life and about how some people take that time and effort to spend time with their parents at a stage while they are still fit and healthy, particularly after the parents have retired. Some feel that if the parents want to see them they can visit rather than the other way round, this means that they don't need to disrupt their lifestyle or need to spend the time or effort to visit. People come up with many excuses for why they can't visit their parents, for example the cost Or how difficult it is for the to organise some time to visit. Often the reality is that they want to do just what they want to do. Be so careful that you don't leave things until it is too late. To be honest there is not much point leaving it until the person is seriously ill or something similar. It is then too late. It maybe that you can then try to salve your own conscious but that is pretty hard to rationalize.

After my parents retired and came back to Christchurch one of their dearest wishes was to have a family Christmas. It is a deep regret of mine that I was never able to organise this. Another regret that I have is that I was not able to look after Mum at home on my own and needed to put her into care. However, of course I do know that I was always here for them and especially with Mum after Dad died when she was at her most vulnerable. I was also able to provide the financial support to enable her to have the extras while in the home to give her the best quality of life I could and at the same time carry out her wishes.  It must be wonderful to be able to think: well I did everything I could, for me I know that I did certain things but regret not doing others.

Watching the cricket we can see parallels. People can find the time and money to do what they want to do.

People must do what their conscience tells them to and it is nice if you can have fewer regrets when your parents go. It is hard when you know that you did not do things when it was possible.

I urge people to take that time and effort to spend time with their parents before it is too late.