George got up this morning and had his coffee and was watching the Olympic games on TV. I was doing various things like dressing etc. When I went back into the lounge and no George!! Found him - he had gone back to bed and was asleep...
With the white board which I keep on the wall so he can see what is on each day I have found now that I need to keep it very simple or otherwise he gets very confused. I have on it:
the day - he is never sure what day of the week it is so he checks that constantly
what is happening that day (just one or two things)
and that is all that is on there. It saves a lot of confusion for him, he can only cope with one or two things at a time and seeing more things up there becomes very confusing for him; for example I used to have a column where I had things that were coming up and he kept going to that column (on the right of the white board) rather than the day (which I had on the left). Now I just have the one column.
Last night George's youngest son rang him. George really enjoys these calls and it is so nice that his son is able to have some good quality discussions at this time as it will be something that he remembers in the time to come. Unfortunately his other sons have had little or no contact with him this year which will probably be to their detriment in the time to come. I doubt that they accept the diagnosis and also, no doubt, they are just wrapped up in their own lives which is unfortunate as you do not know how long George will be at this stage and it is so good if they could have some good memories. In time they may come to realise how they weren't there at a time when it would have mattered to George, this is where guilt can start. However that is there decision.
Today George has Julie coming later today. She is coming once a week, at 3 o'clock, to do something with George, for example go for a drive, a walk, play cards etc. Last week they went to Sumner and then for a coffee. Today they are off to Lyttelton.
Took Mum to Brighton for coffee yesterday. She enjoyed it and had a pavlova. It was very difficult to get her to eat with a fork or a spoon - fingers straight into the cream and she got it everywhere. I had to feed her most of the time although I do try to keep her independent. She also kept trying to stop everyone who went past as she thinks they are all coming in to see her. Most people of more mature years are very understanding but people in the 12 - 30 year group have trouble understanding what is going on; little kids take no notice which is so nice. You have to keep your eyes on mum the whole time while you are out and about, don't blink or something will have happened...
Took George down to Brighton to get some groceries and took him for a coffee while we were there. When we came home a neighbour came to ask if they could have one of our couches from the old house. We sorted that out - he is using it for his 'man cave'.
George then went back to our old home and came back with 3 large containers of Christmas decorations - gold balls etc. When I asked why he had brought them down he told me so we could cut them up to eat. He thought that they were cheeses!! I have hidden them in the top of the wardrobe in the spare room!!!
Took George to Sumner for lunch. It was one of the Grab a Deal vouchers I had purchased. George loves going out all the time. He had an open chicken and bacon sandwich which he enjoyed.
I have been reading some books about dealing with early stage dementia and will start putting up some ideas for others in this blog.
One of the old men at mum's home had been refusing to eat and drink and died towards the end of last week. It is very distressing to see them like this and it makes you wonder about letting them have to end their lives like that.
George has been asked to work with a student from the University of Canterbury. The students are in the middle of their Bachelor's degrees and as part of their course they have to work with a person with Alzheimer's. George still has great powers of discussion 'the gift of the gab' and loves nothing better than to 'chew the fat'. I will be very interested in how this goes.
I went to an Alzheimer's meeting today to give a talk about using respite care. I tended to focus on all the things I did not know when I went to use it hoping that it might help others when they go to use it.
This is an interesting presentation about Alzheimer's.
George had a meeting two days ago. He is a member of a committee who look at Canterbury's sporting greats to select two of them to become Canterbury Sporting Legends.
The meeting started at 11 and finished at 2. As it was over the other side of town I made two appointments for myself and returned to pick him up at 1.45.
I waited and
I waited...
At 2.15 I went in to see what time they thought that the meeting might conclude. Imagine my surprise when they told me that someone took George home as at about 1 o'clock they decided to cancel the meeting as two of the other committee members had not turned up.
George did not have house keys...
I raced home. He had dropped his papers and the mail on the doorstep but no George. I went running round the property and over to the beach to see if I could see him. I had just got home when up the drive came George - he had decided to catch a bus to Brighton.
This is an interesting video on the stages of Alzheimer's.
George had a phone call from one of his sons, he loves hearing from any of them.
George went to Harakeke club yesterday. They spend a lot of time sitting around and socialising. He has found around four other men who he relates well to and they chat about all sorts of things.
While George was at the club I went to visit mum. She is loosing language and starting to make words up. This is something that is also happening to George and is not something that I had anticipated.
Mum is also having difficulty swollening pills (spits them out). She has a chest infection at the moment which doesn't help her at all. I chatted to her about my sister's visit but I am not sure if she remembered or not, as I have said before it is very much 'living in the moment'.
George has been having some difficulty shaving; he doesn't see all the areas he is missing. His old razor packed up six months ago and was unable to be fixed. I bought him a new one, the equivalent of the old one. He keeps mucking things up so it won't go. This time I have been able to fix it and will have to take in to the shop for repair. I know that it is going to happen again. Yesterday George and I bought a disposable razor and shaving cream. He had never used one before so I taught him to use it. He did do a better job than with an electric one - I suspect it is because he was carefully looking in the mirror while he did it. We'll need to see how things go.
My sister has been wonderful and done a lot of housework while she has been here which has been marvellous as this chest infection I have had has left me breathless after small amounts of work. She has just been a godsend.
I have been very busy taking George here and there - nothing exciting but just time consuming. My sister has been here looking after mum this week which has been a godsend as Mum has been unwell as have I.
Last night one of George's old work colleagues was retiring and he was asked to the farewell. When we got there people were giving speeches. They stopped to open the door for George. When he went in they all clapped - everyone was thrilled to see him. He had a wonderful social night.
Last night George got up sometime before 3.30 a.m. and got dressed. I found him in the lounge and told him it was the middle of the night and went back to bed. After a while he came back to bed and went back to sleep.
When I got up this morning I found he had left me a cup of coffee in the lounge. It was cold so I warmed it up in the micro wave. I took one sip!! I then found that George had put all the coffee from the jar (over 50g) into this one cup of coffee. There was no coffee left in the jar and the jar had been cleaned out. I think he had put the water in the jar and then poured it into the cup.
George is managing pretty well at the moment. Today he went out and picked up the cabbage leaves that had fallen down and put them in the rubbish bin - he did this by himself without asking!! Sometimes he does things that surprise you. When I got home from seeing mum yesterday George had taken a bus to Brighton and had got himself a few things at the shop while he was down there.
While I was at the home with mum yesterday she slumped down and had a turn (I think it was a mini stroke). She lost all colour in her skin, her eyes went blank, the right side of her mouth was slack. She kept going in and out of this state for about 10 minutes. She then went to the toilet and came right. The doctor went to the home and checked her out and said she was OK.
My sister arrived from Australia today and went off to see mum at about lunch time today. When she got there mum had fallen on the floor in her room and no one was there to help her. Unfortunately Mum does tend to wander off a bit and it is hard to keep track of her and everyone else as well but I do know that the staff do their best.
We are off to memory clinic today. George loves going out. I have now got into the habit of taking him for a coffee and toasted sandwich as part of the 'going out'. Yesterday I had to go to the hospital for a test so George came too (he
wanted to). When I had finished guess where we went? The nearest cafe... - I have to check before we go out as to what clothes he has on. Yesterday he had on his pyjama top under a jersey, I decided that as others would probably not be aware I would not worry.
I must admit that I find my life is taken up with taking George where he has to go, seeing mum, cleaning up after George, doing house work - sounds boring? It is and I also find it pretty stressful.
Something I have found is that those with Alzheimer's have little or no consideration for anyone else. I guess it is because they are in their own little world. They do expect that everything will be done for them. I am not sure how those who live alone get on.
