Home again

George came home yesterday. The washing is already underway. The toilet paper is now coming quickly off the roll and is found in strange places. I have his seat well set up so that, hopefully, it will remain protected. He is still regarded as rest home level and not yet what they call D3 which is the level where they go into a dementia unit.

I use this home as it is one of the few that will take bookings. I have developed a good relationship with the admin staff and they always fit him in, sometimes in a very plush apartment. This home has largely been rebuilt due to the earthquakes. The rooms are lovely and the staff very nice. There are activities for the residents but very little interaction between staff and residents. I spoke to a nurse about this yesterday and she that actually there is not the interaction as they don't have time. The dementia unit is on the 3rd floor. This is something I would not be happy about, it is so nice for people to be able to go outside,everyone loves to smell the flowers. There is a lot of research to support this view about those with dementia and gardens. When the new gardens are completed at Mum's home I am planning to wheel her out into the gardens and sit in the sunshine, a thing I always appreciate.

Little things

It is the little things that count. This morning I left home to go and do some shopping at 8.30 a.m. As I got near the shop I thought, 'this is something I used to do but no longer can', the freedom made me feel great. Got a park right outside and was in the shop and back home in under an hour!! Wow, so great.

Last night I got a call from the home where George is and they said that they needed more clothes. This puzzled me and I asked what sort. They said he had nothing to wear to bed last night. I said that he wore onesies and that I had packed 2. They said that they were in the wash. I took more over. Guess what?? The other ones were in his drawer!!! I wasn't a happy camper.

This is something you need to be aware of: if anything goes wrong in a home where your loved one is if anything happens that they ring you straight away which you would expect but also be aware that while many times it is just to let you know about something other times you have to go to the home straight away. When you are the only family member around this means it is you.

Time slip sliding away

I spent nearly four hours today getting the measurements to the place to get a quote for curtains and carpets. It was on the other side of town and then I had to go through each measurement with them. Very time consuming. On top of that they charge $75 for the curtain quote and $75 for the carpet quote. One more thing done however.

Getting there

One foot in front of the other is good travelling so they say. Got some windows cleaned and also have been stripping and airing the beds and bedrooms as usually I change the beds but it is good to give everything a good airing which I am doing while I have the time. I know that it all probably doesn't seem a lot but it makes me feel better and therefore I feel better about things which is the main objective. I have had to learn to ignore what others think and concentrate on what I can achieve.

Airing and steam cleaning

I am stripping beds and airing them thoroughly before remaking. I am also steam cleaning all the furniture. Although it probably doesn't show to the naked eye I know how much cleaner they are.

George can no longer cope with trousers and a belt so I am taking those out of his wardrobe and I will get rid of them (keep a couple of pairs in case we need them and will keep the belts for him).

Lovely day so have done some washing and now will tackle lawns and gardens.

Haven't heard from the home so they must be coping.

Making the most of the time....

Nice

Got quite a bit done yesterday. Weather was foul - cold with rain and hail so it was a good day to do some spring cleaning. I still have plenty more to do but feel very happy with what I have achieved so far. Something I certainly notice with George is that he is like a little magpie and secrets all sorts of things. I have found some important papers that were needed for our last year's tax return. As the rest of the stuff is with the accountant I need to scan and send these to him, just as well I have found these  and hope that I don't find too many more!

How nice to rush to the toilet and not have to check that it is clean first!

How nice to wake up and find that the cleaning up I did yesterday is still tidy!

So little time

Getting into some cleaning today. Although I clean the toilet and bathroom floors constantly today I have been scrubbing! The weather is revolting with hail and high wind.

Tomorrow I have to go to Nurse Maud for George and also visit Mum as well as taking a little boy to improve his reading. Another day I need to go over to the other side of town to try to get a quote for our carpets and curtains. Measuring up for this is very time consuming. I realise that the time George is away will go very quickly and I will not get everything done but every little helps.

George liked the new building at the rest home so I hope he enjoys his time there.

Respite care 2

Getting George to respite care today which I am really looking forward to. I mentioned about washing - on the second load this morning and will have another one after I have taken him in. Unfortunately he has taken stuff I had packed out but luckily I found it or things would have been difficult as he would not have had the clothes he needed but I am just doing all that again!! Been a difficult morning as George woke up in a real mess and straight into the shower which took some time to get hot enough and it was difficult to keep him in one place while we were waiting.

On with getting ready....

Respite care

When someone goes into a home for respite care all their belongings have to be labelled. Very happy as I have found a place where they do iron on ones which are so easy. With Mum's stuff I had to sew each one on. Remember this is every sock, pair of undies etc - very time consuming.

I have George going in to respite care this weekend. I am so looking forward to:

• Not having to do constant washing
• Not having to amuse someone else
• Not having to take someone else here there and everywhere
• Not having to clean the toilet 2 or 3 times a day
• Having a good night's sleep
• Having a read
• Having a lie in bed
• Doing what I want, when I want

It actually takes ages to get someone ready for respite care and I have decided to have a case ready so I can just add his personal things quickly if I need to put him into respite care quickly; for example an emergency.

Doctor calling

After getting George dressed this morning I then found him with a jersey. He had put it on: one leg through the neck opening and another leg down a sleeve.

Then I was getting ready to visit Mum. I saw George going towards the window and asked him where he was going. He was adamant that the doctor was calling to him!!

At the home I was talking to someone else and telling him how I nearly lost the TV. He told me that his wife had continually gone on 'why is that bitch watching us?' and things like that until a point where he never turned the TV on.

Going, going, not quite gone

Nearly lost the TV last night.

I was in the kitchen area getting tea when I saw George approaching the TV with his hand outstretched ready to pull the TV over!!!

I shouted out and luckily he stopped midway. I asked what he was doing and he said he was answering the door! He thought that the person on the TV was someone coming to call.

The caregiver often needs to keep one eye on the person to avoid some of these things happening. Obviously you can't watch all the time, that is the tricky part if you are the only one as you can not be everywhere at once.

Continuing up and down

George continues to be up and down so I find that I have to go with the floe. Caregivers will find that basically their needs and wants have to fit around those of person they are caring for.

Today I was my usual lazy self. I spent all morning taking him to the doctor and then getting things for him and found that the whorl morning had gone and I had achieved nothing!

While we were with the doctor she and I also discussed George's progress. She is great as she similar ideas to my own about medication and quality of life for old age people. She also has a bedridden mother who is in her 90's so has a realistic understanding. She is also in my age group. I think it is very useful to have a doctor like this who you can trust and who have an understanding of the situation.

Progression issues

George has been very confused this week which has been very trying and quite difficult for me. I have not been sure how much of this has been due to the disease progressing or something else.

Usually I try to keep things to a simple routine but various things have changed our routines this week which may have contributed to George's confusion. He finds it hard to do things quickly or if things are different.

On Friday George's caregiver was our experienced one and he also noticed how confused George was. He suggested fish oil tablets and a teaspoon of lecithin. We went out for coffee. George loves doing this. Afterwards I was going to go shopping but changed my mind as George seemed a bit strange. On the way home we got the fish oil tablets and some lecithin which I gave him. He had a big sleep during the afternoon and an early night.

We are seeing the doctor on Monday as he also has fluid retention in his left leg but to be honest I was thinking he may have to go into a home sooner rather than later.

This morning what a change! Chatting away flat out and back to normal - as much as possible. I will be keeping up with these supplements.