Tuesday, June 23, 2015

Another learning curve

In 2010 came our first big earthquake followed in February 2011 by another when there was a loss of many lives and destruction of our city. Between these two major earthquakes ( 4 months ) I had made the change to retire early to look after my mother then my mother suffered a sacral fracture
  1. sacral fracture is a break in your sacrum. The sacrum is a triangle-shaped bone that is found at the bottom of the spine.
and had to go into a home as it was impossible for me to look after her by myself. She had developed great anxieties while in hospital which meant she could not be left alone for a second.

The earthquake destroyed our house and a lot of the contents.

Before she got Alzheimer's Mum ensured that everyone knew what she wanted to have left in her estate. As one of those with an EPA and the only one here I knew that I would need to financially look after her as well as her own income in order to pay for the home, ensure that the estate was as she wanted and that I provide the best level of quality of life for her that I could.

Then came the second earthquake where I lost my home and many possessions.  I was just so relieved that everyone here was OK and felt that possessions meant very little.

It was at this time that I became aware that George too had Alzheimer's.

I also felt really relieved as my sisters and I had an agreement that the money I spent here on my mother they would use an equivalent share over in Australia to buy Xmas and birthday presents for their families from me and in return things I did here was from the three of us. It was great knowing that they had plenty to buy some great gifts for them, their children and grandchildren each year. This was important to me as it meant that the families all knew I thought of them at special times and family is important to me.

I admit that initially I just panicked as I knew that I no longer had a source of income to sustain all this but in a strange way the earthquake gave me the perspective to know what was important so I ensured that Mum had the best quality of life she could have under the circumstances and was able to ensure that her estate was actually in a better situation than she expected.

What made me think of this? Well I have just been reading an article discussing some research about rich people and how they perceive money. It was very interesting and certainly made some valid points such as many of these people lack empathy for the plight of others and feel that everyone can be in their position if they only worked harder...

The research also found that the wealthy are more likely to cheat and lie.



I admit that initially I was very worried about my own future and how I would manage as I knew it was my investments that I was eating into. These of course I had saved for my retirement. However after I got over thinking of my future I decided it was more important to give the two of them the best quality of life I could and let the future take care of itself. I am so pleased I did. I know that I carried out Mum's wishes during her illness and in death to the best of my ability and morally that was important to my well-being as well as knowing she would have been pleased.

Money is not as important as you may think. 

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